How To Tell If A Girl Likes You: 23 Signs + 12 Signs She Doesn’t



Krati Mehra


December 31, 2023

Krati Mehra

By Krati Mehra

mbg Contributor

Krati Mehra is an empowerment coach, host of Experible podcast, speaker, and author. She has a Masters from College Faculty London and a Bachelors in Psychology from Panjab College.

Stylish couple smiling at each other.

Picture by Ana Luz Crespi / Stocksy

December 31, 2023

These are just a few essential questions that want answering, significantly for guys making the primary transfer. Misreading the alerts can result in some awkward, face-palm-worthy moments and take you from charming to creepy in brief order.

The truth is, there’s research1 displaying that typically males are inclined to overestimate a girl’s sexual curiosity. So, the problem is actual, and it is sufficient to make one nostalgic for less complicated occasions—assume Victorian period when dropping a handkerchief was like sliding into somebody’s DMs. Positive, these guys needed to cope with means much less tech and far more prime hats, however a minimum of that they had a transparent sign when somebody was into them.

All just isn’t misplaced, nevertheless. There are some stable indicators that may point out a girl’s curiosity, and whereas no signal is a 100% assure, seeing sufficient of them may be taken as a sneaky however particular sign of reciprocal curiosity. 

23 indicators a woman likes you


There’s frequent and extended eye contact

As Al Pacino mentioned, “The eyes, chico, they by no means lie!” So pay attention to eye contact—and never simply fleeting glances, however extended, intense eye contact.

A research from the Psychological Science Journal2 exhibits, as an illustration, that prolonged eye contact is a strong, non-verbal means of indicating engagement and real curiosity.

If a woman is excited about you, in keeping with relationship coach and sexologist at BedBible, Suzannah Weiss, she will provide you with all her consideration throughout a dialog. “She’s going to flip in the direction of you. Take a look at you. They will not bury themselves of their cellphone or a e-book, and so they’ll make eye contact with you,” she explains.

If her pupils dilate, it is a refined physiological response that may point out attraction as effectively. If she glances down when your eyes meet, and it occurs just a few occasions, it would imply she’s a bit nervous or not fairly prepared to indicate her playing cards but, however she might nonetheless be into you.

To take it a step additional, suggests professor and communication professional Beth Ribarsky Ph.D., discover if she is partaking within the triangle methodology, which is “holding eye contact, then trying to the lips, and again to the eyes.”


She mirrors your actions

Suppose you discover a woman mirroring your physique language, like crossing her legs once you cross yours or touching her face once you do. In that case, it is a sturdy indication of attraction that demonstrates rising affinity. 

As licensed marriage and household therapist Kim Homan, LMFT, tells mindbodygreen, “These refined bodily cues may be unconscious indications of consolation and attraction.”


She initiates conversations & seeks out your organization 

Once you worth somebody as a social companion, you intentionally hunt down their firm. In a crowded room, she could sit subsequent to you, be a part of golf equipment or communities you are part of, and even plan joint actions and outings. 

“If she continuously initiates conversations, responds promptly to your messages, and appears genuinely excited about your life and opinions, it is a good signal,” Homan says, including, “Communication is the bedrock of any relationship, and her effort in sustaining an ongoing dialogue can signify her curiosity in deepening the connection.”

As psychologist Ketan Parmar, M.D., MBBS, provides, if a woman goes out of her strategy to discover alternatives to be round you or invitations you to occasions, that may be an indication she likes you. “Take note of whether or not she prioritizes spending time with you over different commitments,” he provides.


She reaches out over textual content & social media

In case you’re each lively on social media, you could discover she likes and even feedback on most of your posts. There could also be common good night time texts, or if and once you abandon a dialog resulting from lack of time, she resumes it on the following accessible alternative. 

She clearly wishes a steady reference to you, and texting and social media, in immediately’s world, are the instruments of alternative to keep up that connection. 

“Texting is a big a part of any relationship (particularly lately!),” says Kiana Reeves, somatic intercourse educator, pelvic care practitioner, licensed doula, and chief model officer at Foria. “If there’s flirty banter, constant forwards and backwards, or if she texts you out-of-the-blue about one thing you as soon as talked about, these are nice indicators of curiosity,” she provides.


She exhibits curiosity in your ideas & experiences

When we like someone, who they’re, what issues to them, and the way they transfer by the world turns into very important to us. 

If a woman is excited about you, she is going to wish to know what makes you tick. She’ll present a real curiosity in your opinions, reactions, interactions, and the experiences which have formed you. If she engages you in significant conversations, asks many open-ended questions, and thoughtfully responds to what you share, it signifies that she cares.


She tries to draw & impress you

When a woman is , she is going to attempt to attract and retain your attention. She could flaunt each her mental prowess and her bodily look. She could discover methods to reveal her data, significantly on topics of mutual curiosity, reinforcing your compatibility.

“Folks typically attempt to impress these they’re excited about by placing additional effort into their look. If a woman seems to exit of her strategy to look good when she is aware of she will likely be seeing you, it may very well be an indication of attraction,” Parmar explains.


She expresses concern to your wellbeing 

A rising curiosity in somebody’s total wellbeing is an indication of deepening emotional attachment. In accordance with therapist and scientific director at Profound Therapy, Lindsey Tong, LCSW, when a woman is falling for you, she is going to categorical her deepening feelings by actively caring for you. 

She could take care of you when unwell, encourage you to undertake more healthy habits or gently nudge you in the direction of higher way of life selections.

“If she notices that you’re feeling down or having a foul day, she is going to attempt to cheer you up or supply help. She may exit of her strategy to do issues for you, resembling bringing you your favourite meals or serving to you with one thing,” Tong explains. 

Such emotional consciousness occurs solely when somebody is attuned to you and pays consideration to even refined shifts in your temper and conduct. 


She playfully teases & banters with you

Teasing, particularly of a flirtatious selection, is usually a good signal of attraction. She would possibly playfully poke enjoyable at you and have interaction in lighthearted banter, all achieved in good spirits to forge a deeper bond.

It permits her to specific her curiosity whereas sustaining a mischievous, ambiguous tone. Plus, if this is not how she normally behaves with others, it may be seen as a fair stronger signal of her curiosity in you.


She blushes or will get flustered round you

When a woman blushes or appears nervous round you, particularly in response to your compliments or any overt consideration, it is typically an indication of romantic curiosity. She could fidget if she is worked up to be round you but additionally feels self-conscious. This sometimes occurs in emotionally charged conditions.

Throughout an interplay that brings your mutual attraction into focus, if she’s not able to make any particular transfer, she could expertise stress and really feel weak and uncovered. Such moments have to be dealt with with grace and affected person empathy, recognizing the delicacy of her feelings and the scenario.


There may be open physique language

Research5 confirms that “postural expansiveness” may be taken as an indication of attraction. One caveat: Take into account that private and cultural variations can have an effect on physique language.

Typically, nevertheless, when a woman likes you, she could lean in the direction of you, uncross her arms, smile continuously, and face you straight, signaling her consolation and curiosity. Moreover, if she’s sitting with crossed legs, however her ft are pointed in the direction of you, it might recommend a need to get nearer.

As Homan notes, “These refined bodily cues may be unconscious indications of consolation and attraction.”


She introduces you to her mates & plans outings collectively

The concord between our mates and romantic companions is crucial; they’re each necessary components of our lives, and in the event that they get alongside, it makes for extra pleasant future interactions.

When a woman takes the step to introduce you to her mates, it is a significant act that means she’s keen on you and possibly hoping for a future with you.

“If this particular person has advised her mates about you, this may be one other nice signal of curiosity. Receiving an invitation to hang around with somebody’s shut group means they belief you and are comfy bringing you into the fold,” Reeves tells mindbodygreen.

Moreover, organizing outings together with her mates and alluring you may imply she is attempting to combine you into her world.


She needs to know the mundane particulars of your life

The on a regular basis facets of your life, resembling your routine, favourite music, go-to recipes, and hobbies—particulars that may bore anybody else—could be fascinating to somebody within the throes of a crush.

She’s going to wish to know these particulars, not simply out of curiosity but additionally so she will discover widespread pursuits and deepen your bond.

“One other vital signal is her effort to be part of your life. This might manifest in her remembering small particulars about your life,” says Homan, explaining that “when somebody invests time and vitality in understanding and understanding you, it typically displays a real curiosity past mere friendship.”


She exhibits curiosity about your loved ones & mates

The curiosity has to transcend mere politeness; somebody excited about a deeper relationship will ask private questions on your dad and mom and siblings. She’s going to inquire about and touch upon your loved ones dynamics, the personalities of your shut mates, and household traditions. Moreover, she is going to discover a strategy to talk her readiness to take part in household occasions.

It is a refined means of expressing an curiosity in turning into part of your world and forging relationships with you and people you care about. It suggests her curiosity in a long-term future and her willingness to embrace your wider social circle.


She compliments you

If a woman likes you, she’ll continuously praise you, noticing and appreciating qualities others would possibly overlook, reflecting the particular consideration she’s paying you. The compliments will likely be deep and about extra than simply the floor qualities.


She laughs at your jokes (even the unfunny ones)

It is a useless giveaway and the one factor that may distinguish a buddy from a romantic curiosity. Somebody excited about you’ll giggle at all your jokes; mates, however, will giggle at you quite than with you. 

“Laughter is a common love language. If a woman genuinely enjoys your organization and finds you amusing, she is going to giggle even when your jokes aren’t superb. Typically, it’s their means of expressing their admiration and curiosity in you,” says licensed marriage and household therapist, Raul Haro, LMFT.


She plans surprises or offers considerate items

Spending cash on somebody, particularly when you’ve got it, is simple—however planning a shock requires effort. When a woman surprises you, and it resonates deeply with you, creates a particular second, or holds private significance, that gesture speaks volumes.

It exhibits that she is aware of you effectively and is prepared to speculate her time, vitality, and assets into pleasing you. She clearly cherishes your bond and desires to nurture it. 

Thoughtful gifts are particular for comparable causes. It’s not simply the present of an merchandise however a mirrored image of her regard for you. The extra significant and private it’s, the deeper her appreciation for you. 


She smiles rather a lot in your presence 

Smiling is a type of non-verbal communication that alerts happiness, heat, and attraction.

Being within the firm of somebody we like naturally makes us joyful, and this sense intensifies when there’s additionally a romantic curiosity and the anticipation of a extra intimate relationship. Take note of whether or not she’s continuously smiling or laughing—and doing so genuinely—when she’s with you.


She continuously touches you & exhibits bodily affection

Ribarsky tells mindbdoygreen that incidental, flirtatious touching is a standard means of signaling attraction. After we contact somebody who reciprocates our curiosity, it causes a launch of feel-good chemical compounds in our brains.

“As primitive as it might sound, we frequently ‘groom’ folks we like. We could do one thing so simple as choosing fuzz off somebody’s sweater, brushing one thing out of their hair, and many others. Typically, it’s very purposeful. More often than not, it’s unconscious conduct after we like or care about somebody,” Ribarksy says. 

Moreover, if she indulges in bodily shows of affection, she may be very comfy with you, trusts you, and wishes to create intimacy with you. 

It is necessary to do not forget that just some ladies will really feel comfy initiating bodily contact, so a scarcity of it does not essentially imply disinterest. Nevertheless, when she does have interaction in these small touches, if she reserves such gestures for you, it is a vital indicator of her curiosity and a means for her to get nearer to you subtly but meaningfully.


She will get jealous of different girls

She could get jealous when she sees you spending time with different girls if she is . She could categorical this jealousy by inquiring about your interactions with them, asking in the event you’re excited about any of them, or displaying a touch of possessiveness when different girls are round you.

Extreme jealousy is regarding, so be cautious if the thing of your affection is veering in the direction of an excessive type of this conduct. Nevertheless, delicate jealousy can stem from insecurity or concern of dropping your affection to another person and may be taken as a constructive signal.


She permits herself to be weak with you

Parmar notes that if a woman wishes greater than friendship with you, she could share private facets of her life with you. “Folks share private tales with these they really feel comfy round,” he explains, including, “If a woman begins sharing intimate particulars about her life, it may very well be an indication that she trusts and likes you.”

Sharing intimate particulars of our lives makes us weak, and there’s an inherent concern in that, however we courageous this concern for these we deeply belief and need to have in our lives. Additionally, in the event you can learn the indicators, this won’t merely be a gesture of belief. The act will stem from a deep want so that you can know her. 

She may invite you to open up and reciprocate. She may search your recommendation and steerage on private issues, which can additional signify her belief and respect to your opinions.


She mentions different guys to incite jealousy

She could carry up different guys in dialog or speak about them in a means that appears supposed to make you jealous. You might also discover her being overly pleasant with different guys once you’re current whereas concurrently glancing your strategy to see the way you reply. 

Is it infantile? Sure—however we’re all fools in love. 


She treats you otherwise 

This is among the extra apparent indicators {that a} woman likes you and isn’t just being good. For example, there is perhaps a noticeable distinction in how she treats you in comparison with her different mates.

This might manifest in a number of methods—she remembers trivial particulars about you that others would possibly discover inconsequential, makes plans effectively prematurely, exhibits an apparent desire to your firm, seizes each excuse to be round you, and turns into noticeably extra flirtatious and attentive once you’re collectively. These behaviors recommend that you’ve a particular place in her life. 

Nonetheless, to gauge whether or not this regard has romantic undertones, it’s essential to think about the general context of your interactions, her physique language, and the character of your bodily exchanges, if any. 


She seeks readability round relationship standing

Her curiosity in your relationship standing, subtly expressed or not, is telling. She may also discover a means to make sure you know she’s single and open to a relationship. This conduct isn’t just about understanding your availability or speaking hers; it’s her means of opening the door to no matter is feasible between you. 

This checklist may be populated additional with so many extra indicators of a girl’s curiosity in you, however in and of itself, no single signal is sufficient to offer you a transparent reply. Many of those behaviors will also be expressions of platonic affection, however observing a number of of those indicators forming a constant sample might signify one thing extra. 

12 indicators a woman does not such as you

To additional make clear issues, listed below are some indicators that sometimes recommend a scarcity of curiosity. Mixed with the checklist above, they may help you distinguish between romantic and platonic emotions.


She does not provoke contact

If she makes no effort to be round you or provoke contact, whether or not in particular person, on-line, or by way of textual content, it would sign disinterest in a relationship.

One other signal may be canceling plans with little to no discover and a reluctance to reschedule.


There are temporary, disengaged conversations

Homan believes that if a girl takes her time responding to your messages, avoids sharing private particulars, and appears disinterested in your life, these are indicators of disinterest.

“When a woman is uninterested, she could not reciprocate your efforts in dialog. This might manifest as not asking questions in return, not sharing a lot about herself, or altering the topic to keep away from private subjects,” says relationship professional Lachlan Brown.


There may be restricted or avoidant eye contact

Avoiding eye contact can point out discomfort or lack of curiosity in fostering a deeper connection.


Her physique language is reserved

When she shows closed-off physique language, like crossed arms, dealing with away or sustaining a bodily distance throughout conversations, it exhibits her disinterest. In accordance with Weiss, it might be time to desert your pursuit in the event you discover such conduct. 

“If somebody strikes away from you or begins speaking to another person or goes on their cellphone, then I’d say allow them to be,” she says. 


There is a lack of reciprocation

“All of it comes right down to how they reciprocate your tone or actions. For instance, if they’re ignoring your texts or dodging your invitation to get drinks, this is usually a extra apparent signal that they are not ,” warns Reeves. Or as Haro provides, you would possibly purchase her items or do issues for her, however she by no means reciprocates.

If all the things goes unreciprocated—from invites to gestures of affection—it might be time to chop your losses.


She talks about different romantic pursuits

If she talks about different males she finds enticing and overtly and clearly states her curiosity in pursuing them, take that to imply you might be firmly within the buddy zone. “That is very true if she seeks your courting recommendation or mentions her crushes to you,” Haro provides.


She avoids one-on-one time with you

“If a woman is not excited about you, she’ll keep away from being alone or occurring dates. She could make excuses or cancel last-minute plans,” Haro tells mindbodygreen. 

This conduct may be significantly telling if she persistently makes excuses to keep away from one-on-one conditions or appears uncomfortable about spending time collectively in additional intimate settings. Her reluctance to interact in solo actions with you may point out her need to keep up a purely platonic relationship.


She exhibits no real interest in your life

If she by no means asks about your day, pursuits, or opinions, and/or disregards your emotions, that signifies a scarcity of emotional funding.


She avoids bodily contact

Bodily transferring away from you, avoiding contact, by no means paying any compliments, and giving a half-hearted response to the compliments you give point out a scarcity of bodily attraction.

As Brown notes, “If she consciously retains a bodily distance or avoids conditions the place shut contact would possibly happen, it is seemingly an indication she’s not comfy with the thought of a more in-depth relationship.”


She ignores your social media posts

If she is lively on social media however by no means likes or feedback in your posts however does have interaction with others, it might denote a scarcity of curiosity on her half.


She does not present you any particular therapy

No particular therapy or desire to your firm could recommend she sees you as a buddy.


She explicitly communicates her disinterest

She could take the sledgehammer method and allow you to know in specific phrases that she just isn’t excited about something aside from a friendship. Now, except you wish to barrel proper into harassment territory, it’s time to again off. 

Different suggestions to bear in mind

The primary impediment on the trail of romance typically entails making the important alternative of both risking rejection by expressing curiosity, or probably lacking a romantic alternative by not performing. 6

Research6 means that remorse over missed love alternatives typically outweighs the embarrassment of rejection and will have extra vital life penalties. So with this in thoughts, it might be sensible to pursue your curiosity cautiously, even with out clear alerts.

Listed below are just a few different suggestions to assist with that:

Proceed with warning & be respectful

Everytime you’re flirting, it is important respect boundaries and search consent. If you wish to categorical your curiosity with out lively encouragement, accomplish that respectfully and calmly. In case you discover indicators of discomfort, again off.

Being approachable and pleasant with out being pushy is important. Weiss recommends testing the waters with one thing easy like, “I might love to hang around in the event you’d be open to that,” or, “Might I get your quantity? I believe it might be good to talk extra.”

“Give them a well mannered invitation, and it is OK in the event you’re not in a position to learn how they’re instantly; you will get a way of that over time simply by reaching out and being pleasant and step by step—in the event that they reply effectively—suggesting a date,” says Weiss. 

Specific your emotions in refined however significant methods 

Earlier than revealing your emotions, guarantee they are not dedicated to another person, advises Parmar, emphasizing respect and decreasing the probability of rejection. To precise your curiosity, behave in a means that signifies attraction, resembling asking about their pursuits and providing compliments that transcend bodily look.

“Keep a light-hearted, humorous method,” Brown advises, including to maneuver ahead with a stability of confidence and humility, and “keep away from dominating conversations or making all of it about you.” 

In case you obtain encouragement, you may construct on that. If her response is muted, you may attempt to woo her. Keep in mind that typically, the dearth of encouragement just isn’t out of disinterest. Even assured girls, in relation to love and romance, can change into shy due to fears round rejection and vulnerability which can be a lot part of courting. 

Present real curiosity in her life, and as a part of your marketing campaign, preserve a cheerful disposition once you’re round her. Pleased folks gentle up a room by their sheer presence, and if the woman associates constructive feelings with you, will probably be a degree in your favor.

It’s also possible to pay her particular consideration. Deal with her otherwise; make it evident by your phrases and actions that she occupies a particular place for you. 

Or, you may be extra direct

As psychologist and relationship professional Rod Mitchel, M.C., M.Sc., recommends, you may all the time take a extra simple method. “A easy, honest expression of your emotions, with out elaborate schemes or video games, speaks volumes about your respect for her and the potential relationship,” he says.

Tong agrees, suggesting a respectful method that does not strain her to reply or reciprocate. “Inform them what you admire about them and why you admire them. Ensure that additionally to respect their boundaries and provides them area to reply,” she provides.

Deal with unrequited feelings with grace

“The very best response is to respect their emotions and area and transfer on. It is perhaps exhausting at first, however keep in mind, everybody deserves somebody who reciprocates their emotions simply as intensely,” says Tong. 

Keep away from obsessing over the result and respect her choice if she says no. “It is pure to really feel damage and dissatisfied, however it’s necessary to not take it personally or lash out at them,” Tong warns. Accepting the scenario helps heal and discover somebody who reciprocates your emotions.


How have you learnt if a woman is excited about you?

To know if a woman is excited about you, discover if she engages in conduct that will point out attraction, like frequent eye contact, initiating conversations and bodily contact, mirroring your actions, or turning her physique in the direction of you as you discuss.

How have you learnt if a woman likes you secretly?

Secret admiration could also be expressed by refined behaviors like shy glances, fidgeting when paid a praise, displaying nervousness or additional enthusiasm in your presence, and an curiosity in your life that appears above the norm for informal mates.

How have you learnt if a woman likes you or is simply being good?

If she behaves otherwise with you in comparison with her different mates and finds excuses to the touch you or discuss to you, her curiosity in your life goes past what’s typical for mates.

How have you learnt if a woman is falling for you?

Observe her physique language, how she talks to you, and the way she treats you in private and non-private, in search of deeper indicators of affection and connection (i.e. making vital efforts to spend extra time with you, sharing private and emotional issues, merging your social lives, and many others.).

The takeaway

Understanding whether or not a woman is excited about you may be like taking part in a sport of psychological Jenga. You must observe how she talks and acts with and round you. Preserve a watch out for any particular hints in the way in which she treats you, and see if there is a sample that may offer you that much-needed encouragement to make your transfer. However it’s essential to do that detective work with out letting your emotions cloud your judgment. It is tough, however who does not love an excellent problem? 

Even in the event you discover constructive indicators, there’s nonetheless no assure that your curiosity will likely be reciprocated. Every particular person is exclusive, and there are cultural, social, and familial influences at play that you just can’t account for, regardless of how a lot you strive. 

What you are able to do is be respectful and thoughtful in how you progress ahead. If the sentiments are mutual, it opens the door to a probably lovely and fulfilling relationship. If not, respect her decision, cherish the friendship if it stays, and do not forget that this expertise has taken you one step nearer to discovering somebody extra suitable and able to providing you with the love you deserve.  

Regardless of the consequence, adventures of the center are well worth the journey time, the angst of uncertainty, the fun of the pursuit, and even the heartbreak of rejection.


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